Saturday, February 23, 2013

Facing "Defeet"

  I never stopped to think about it sooner
  I never could imagine how it goes
  From being just a skinny adolescent
  To someone who can’t even see his toes

I haven’t reached that point yet, but I have certainly flirted with it.
Sometimes I have to wonder if we are ever satisfied. When I was young, I was fairly thin and I was very aware of it. Those were the times when I bought comic books. Those books carried ads that affected the way I felt about myself.

Every man my age should remember the ads on the inside back cover of certain comic books. They pictured a skinny guy having sand kicked in his face by some muscle bound stranger. The next scene would show the muscleman being knocked out.

It seems that the message to us was that if we tried this product we would see almost instant results. All of our problems would be solved if we ordered it.
Well, it did not work then and I don’t think it works now. I believe that you have to eat right and get off the couch every once in a while.

After I retired and quit smoking I gained weight. At one point I could barely see my toes when I looked down. I think that wearing size elevens helped me on that.

As I progressed on my fitness journey I began to see more of my feet. I could look down and see my instep. Now, on a good day, I can actually catch a glimpse of my ankles.

It’s not always easy to adjust. I am about four months away from qualifying for Medicare. It seems like old age can creep up on you before you know it. My life is a good one and I hope to enjoy my friends and family for many years to come. It’s just that good health is not always a given. Sometimes you have to do your share too.

Thursday, February 21, 2013

The Clutter Drawer

I’m not so sure it ever should be opened,
Not by someone other than myself;
I’m sure it houses things that I have searched for.
Things that couldn’t  just be somewhere else...


The clutter drawer plays a very important role in my life. It allows me to be a little disorganized without completely losing control. Maybe I am different, but I think people need a way to let down their guard and relax. There seems to be too much pressure on society.


Everyone needs a space that they should not be graded on. Everything doesn’t  have to be perfect and someone else’s business. That’s where the clutter drawer comes into play.

It’s a safe haven for batteries that no longer have the power they once had, screws that came loose from something unknown, and coupons that could have helped, but have long been expired.

It is very possible that nothing in that drawer will ever be used again. Like the extra set of keys to a car that I traded in years ago. I don’t have a logical explanation for my clutter drawer. I just know that I don’t want to lose it for whatever reason.


I have always tried to keep a nice home. I want it to be a warm place where my friends and family feel welcome. However, there is a drawer to the left of my sink that I will defend with my life. It is my link to sanity in an increasingly insane world. It is an area that is off limits to everyone but me!

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Growing Pains

I wonder why these jean no longer fasten;
They fit me a mere twenty years ago.
I’m sure I haven’t grown the least bit taller;
It’s the waistline where it really starts to show.

One of the more recognized faults of men is their refusal to ask for directions. We always want to look like we know what we are doing. Sadly, that is not always the case and that may be a kind way of stating it.


Don’t tell them you heard it here, but we have another flaw in our DNA. We also refuse to try on clothes when you finally drag us to the store. I have never had a problem asking directions, but I am guilty as charged on the fear of the dressing room.


In all honesty, there are two reasons why this subject has finally come up: retirement and the fact that I no longer smoke cigarettes. I am no longer as active as I once was and my taste buds have seemed to be resurrected.


After maintaining the same weight and waistline for four decades, my body was changing and not necessarily for the better. Now, I need to exercise to keep trim where work once took care of that.


Jane had encouraged me to go shopping not that long ago. With Mr. Joe coming out in the fall, we both realized that I needed an upgrade for my wardrobe: I needed to be a step above jeans. I would need to look professional and more like an author.


Thankfully, I have learned to listen to her. I now realize that the dressing room is a necessary evil. That’s two male faults down and a few more to go. I’m working on it.

Friday, February 1, 2013

Offline and Lost (Sing to the tune of the Oscar Mayer jingle)

My computer has a first name; it’s C-r-a-s-h
My computer has a second name; it’s S-c-r-a-p
I used to use it every day, before it died and went away,
A screen that’s blue and a virus too, is all I need to say to you.

Someone once said that you don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.  I remember it most from the Joni Mitchel song, Big Yellow Taxi, but I am sure she wasn’t the first to say these words.

I have to admit that I was dragged both kicking and screaming into the computer age by my son, Jason. He set up a computer for me and taught me Computer 101. He taught me how to e-mail and how to surf the Web without wiping out.

That was roughly ten years ago. I would like to think that I have come a ways since then. While I have improved, no one will see my picture if they look up geek in the dictionary.

I didn’t realize how much I have grown to depend on my computer until it crashed three weeks ago. I have used my computer for everything from paying bills to signing up for Social Security.

But, the thing I missed the most over the past three weeks was being able to go on facebook and “talk” to friends. I guess a person tends to get spoiled. When I was growing up we wrote letters to our friends that lived far away. On occasion we might have called them, but there were no cell phones or unlimited calling plans then.  Long distance calls could be expensive.

Having a computer has enabled me to stay in contact with friends and family near and far. I have been able to reconnect with friends from my childhood. Some of my friends have no interest in learning to use a computer. I found out recently that I can’t seem to do without it.